DarinkaJun 23, 2023

STORM [taste of rain]

- If I eat the plants that are growing on soil, sunshine, rain and air, I connect with the resistant, strong forces of nature.

- It is the nature of the dualistic mind which categorises thoughts, emotions, physical sensations and other perceptual phenomena.

- So, me eating sunflower seeds from a local, ecologic farmer is good because I attach value to it?

- Yes, you can’t avoid it! Sensation>>some e-motion>>thoughts>>some e-motion > > sensations > > >thoughts>>thoughts…

- Are you a robot, making a human machine?

- I’m consciousizing in becoming, in progress.

- I think to myself: without a common sense there is no way living can be lived with understanding. Being broken into parts, relating to others by expressing the reaction to an emotion, thought, physical sensation, is a ”connection error”.

- …???

- I’m aware I am lost in my mind and this robot I was talking to can’t make anything out of my silence. Or maybe it is monitoring that too! Anyway, where was I? Oh, it is response from a calm state of mind that connects in both ways; in- and outside. What matters is from where the force of voice, physical motoric and involuntary movements urge me towards reaction? Is there at all time to take a look? Am I in a back pain, headache, hunger, sleepiness, laziness? And so, I have emotions attached to those physical sensations - without me noticing it?

Yeeez, I am doing it, becoming a human robot! Labelling, analysing, constructing a mental map of what?

At least I am still eating sunflower seeds.

- I noticed you processing on your own as if I wasn’t here. How do you call this?

- Haha! I am gonna hack the system and do something randomly. Surprise without logical explanation!

I took out out a handful of sunflower seeds from the paperbag that was here next to me on the couch from the beginning I started writing, and looked up to the sky. I closed my eyes and my hands gravitated joyfully down and as a release, emptied themselves in the air. I stood there with content in time, a short sunflower rain fall on me and I remembered the freedom I felt when I stood in the storm and rain an hour ago.

Being is too simple, yet we remember it.

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